Sex tapes

Gawker had a post about making your own sex tape in lieu of the recent premiere of yet another celebrity sex tape, this time starring Gene Simmons. A three step process is all there is to consider before hitting the red button. Lasting advise: porn is forever. I watched two short clips of the Gene Simmons sex tape and I was wildly unimpressed. It was about as exciting as watching two slugs hump. The bousite wearing woman was obviously a hooker and just going through the motions. Every time Gene went in for a kiss, she averted her face. We all know what Laura San Giacomo taught us girls in Pretty Woman. You never kiss the johns. Sadly, Gene Simmons' reality show promotes the image of Gene as a rock-n-roll bed buccaneer. I think they are going to need a new marketing scheme.

All these sex tapes have got to put a real damper on porn actors and aspiring entertainers. Just as celebrities killed the era of the super model, will the Jenna Jameson's of the world soon be out of work? Will the slow death of the celebrity now include drug abuse and rehabilitation, reality television shows, nude photo shoots, where-are-they-now rag features and exploitative sex tapes? I think the sex industry should start using B-F celebrities for their own lucrative means. We have reality television shows about making celebrities, detoxing celebrities, slimming celebrities, and celebrities doing their laundry. Why not recruit celebrities for reality sex camps, naughty cooking shows, and dormitory shows with real sex? After watching Gene Simmons in action, it's apparent that the man needs a sex coach or at the very least a can of Jolt. Everything 80's is big now and returning to the big screen. I think the little screen needs Demi Moore, Grace Jones, Morgan Fairchild, and Markie Post in an all girl's dormitory.